Ask Dr. Tracy

Summary Guide for Letting Go


If you've just broken up, or are about to, or are unsure if you should or you shouldn't, you've come to the right place. I can help you. Here are some general guidelines and pointers on where to find more advice on a specific subject:


1. YOU CAN CURE YOUR BROKEN HEART

No matter who left who, if you loved him or her, you're hurting. There's no point in denying it and no future in wallowing in it. Treat the pain. Go immediately to "When He/She Left You -- Coping", and "Letting Go". These articles will help you get rid of the heartache and get on with your life.


2. RECOGNIZE THE SIGNS OF "CRAZY LOVE"

You could be in a Crazy Love relationship without realizing it. I had a whole string of them before I found out that love isn't supposed to make you crazy.

Feigning suicide or pretending you're pregnant, of course, top the list of the most obviously crazy acts, but have you spied on his or her apartment late at night? Gone through the garbage searching for love letters from another person? Called to see if someone else was there and then hung up? Tried to buy his or her love with expensive gifts? Done something ill- advised hoping to make him or her jealous? If so, it's OK; a miraculous return to sanity awaits you as soon as you end the Crazy Love relationship.

Crazy Love results from one-sided love -- when you're "crazy in love" and chasing someone who just drops you a crumb now and then.


3. BEING ALONE IS BETTER THAN BEING IN A BAD LOVE RELATIONSHIP

It's amazing what we'll go through to avoid being alone or to postpone the unpleasantness of a breakup. When do you "owe it to the relationship to make it work," and when do you owe it to yourself to find someone else? Read "When To Get Out Of A Relationship" for my list of valid reasons to call it quits, and then read "Ending It" for pointers on handling the breakup.

Or, if you're simply going out with someone you no longer really care for "until the right person comes along," read my article on "`Convenient' Relationships" to learn about the price you may be paying.


4. DON'T BE PESSIMISTIC ABOUT FINDING A NEW LOVE

It's not as hard as you're probably thinking. I've helped thousands find fulfilling love relationships, and I can help you, too. As soon as you're sure you've graduated from my "Letting Go" article, move on to Section Two of my Library, "How to Find the Right Person".

To provide a little "sharing" for those who are hanging on to hopeless relationships, (or for those who just want to read some entertaining true-life stories), this section of my Library starts off with examples of go-nowhere affairs, crazy love, and one-sided love in a "What I Did For Love" series of case histories, including one of mine.


Related Keywords: Letting Go, Dependency, Love Addiction



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